Isn't it ironic?

I don't listen to those things that I write... and read... I just said something pretty stupid today. And to him, nevertheless. Wow! What am I really doing in my life? Pfft. I feel fat, I am fat.. I feel ugly, I feel stupid... I don't know if I really am the other two. I know I can change my lifestype and eveything and that all it takes is just mind power... but I'm irritated and being such a rebel, even to myself and yet... I don't really know why.

I think I try to be positive but it's kind of hard to really be one. Argh! But I will try.. and I will be... and maintain to be positive in life.

I miss him... missed him so much and all I could say and act was that way... wow. How happy a reunion(?) that was. Bleh! Anyways... what do I feel for him? hmmm.. I don't really know.. I want to believe him... should I? What will be our future then? It's so hard... but I miss him... and I guess I'd say... he's a great friend... and that what I feel for him now, will... well... once I've overcome myself, maybe I'd feel something more. =)

Argh! Why am I even bothering to write in this blog??? I don't want people to read... but anyways, maybe I do and that's why I think I might publish this... no, I will. And people don't have to read if they don't want to. hahaha

So there!